Tonight's topic is jealousy guys lol. But an overview of yesterday first.
Yesterday I went to the guys' home game against Brighton. I wasn't in that great a mood so I grabbed my coat and my umbrella and headed for the door to go for a walk, but one of the refs stopped me and asked if I would do line judge. Sighhhh. I didn't want to, but no body else would so I said yes. I had a bad experience with being line judge before. In the intensity of the game, somehow I crack under the pressure if the call is up to me. I did before and I swear throughout the rest of the game I felt everyone's eyes filled with hate just trying to burn holes in me.
But anywho, this time it wasn't that bad. The ref was really nice. She kept telling me that I was beautiful and how I could/should be a model and how I should do Bay States (which I was planning on applying for anyway) and how I could go far because "you can't teach tall" (Thomas was the first to tell me that!) :D
Before leaving, I gave her my information to keep in contact. Dang, she really boosted my confidence :)
Then stuff happened and I took the train alone only to ride the bus home with my dad.The moral of the story is that I feel great now. Oh, what just a few kind words can do...
Yadda yadda yadda. Now back to the main topic. Today I was invited to two parties. One was Amy's, a friend of Vtang's. I've met her a few times, but I still don't really know her that well. I could've gone to Fire and Ice to celebrate her birthday, but I didn't. Then the other was Jenny's, a teammate (this is the first time I'm actually using her name). Her birthday was last week, but her house party got cancelled last weekend so she was gonna have one today and I was invited. I like Jenny, she's cool. I respect her lots, but being completely honest, I was having doubts about going. I would've gone to build a better relationship with her, to get to know her better. I would've gone to see Goofy and other friends... But then again I didn't want to go because I'm jealous of Jenny, just kinda slightly less than half of a lot. Honestly. The guy I like(d) fell for her instead of me. She's strictly AWESOME at volleyball. She gets the grades. She has loads of friends. She is Jenny.
Then again, I think about it and I'm glad I'm not her. How else am I supposed to learn? Haha. Idk, jealousy sure can be a bitch. I'm not even sure if it is jealousy that I'm feeling. Maybe it's just a really high respect? Who knows.
And then again, I also would've felt awkward going to the party because of a few of Jenny's friends. The girls. You know those girls that you see that are just SO BEATIFUL? And you expect them to be bitches and snobs, right? But from what I can see, these girls aren't... I think.
Yea. Well, I'm just glad that ref boosted my confidence the other day. It helps majorly right about now (funk soul rubber lol). Ummmm, I think that's all I wanted to say. Oh! And this morning two songs were stuck in my head: Today Was A Fairytale and Need You Now. They are so beautiful! Hahah, that seems to be the word of the night. Alright, well it's time for me to read and sleep. Blog you soon lovelies! Jifly! :)